Tuesday, November 25, 2008

one of those angry days...

Drivers in Lagos are probably the most untrained in the world! Trailer drivers get a thrill from popping fright into fellow road users. Public bus drivers drive recklessly; they curse, spit, and fight. They hate the sight of a brand new car, they imagine what a dent would look like by the side of a posh and glittery ride, and they usually go ahead to ‘bless’ a car with one.
Uugh! They just make my hairs stand! The first month I bought my car, I remember the experience was hell.
It just seemed every ‘ugly’ car out there wanted to ‘kiss’ mine. I’d usually run off the road just to stay safe – away from their wicked intentions.

But this is Lagos, you don’t remain ‘simple’ for too long. So I grew brave and dared the buses and even okadas when they tried to play rough. I valiantly gave out the five fingers when I am ‘manhandled’ and on rare occasions give a chase. Ha!

Last Thursday, things didn’t go as planned, and I came out of an accident with a bloodied right-hand.
No, it wasn’t like I was hit and my car tumbled three times and ended in a ditch and I had to crawl out into the streets to scream for help. No!

It was a simple accident really; a private bus driver kissed my car and gave the beautiful thing a dent and ugly scars to go with it. I blared my horn over and over again, but he wouldn’t do anything – I guess he didn’t know what to do, the damage had been done. I was so upset, I started hitting the side of the bus, I grew livid as I picked my shoe and banged at the side of the bus – ‘stupid fool…,’ I cursed. My anger wouldn’t subside, so…wait for this…I slammed a fist into the side window, and the glass shattered all over, bruising my right hand and making the case much more interesting.

I finally got his attention as he jumped out of his vehicle, raving like a theatrical puppet in utter disbelief of what just happened. I on the other hand gave a hearty laugh whilst I tended to my injured hand, blood flowed freely and I wouldn’t stop laughing. He cursed and spat and told me to repair his car. I told him to go to hell.

Now how does it feel being on the other side?

He gave my car a dent, and I gave his bus a shattered window; and I was unwilling to negotiate at all – let every man repair his/her damage, abi?

He wouldn’t let me go, so I wrapped my hand with my handkerchief, got back into my car, switched on the A/C and listened to Cool fm. Yea, I am crazy like that!

An hour or so later, a soldier from heaven came by the side of my car. He smiled at me and told me to explain the situation; and I did. He looked at me queerly; I’m sure he wondered if I was ‘ok’.
“It’s getting late madam, I cannot leave you here with these people, let us resolve this immediately,” he spoke calmly. Of course agberos had gathered, no one needs a crystal ball to picture that. In a second he dispersed the growing crowd of touts, called the driver to the side and pleaded with him… I couldn’t hear what was said as I was listening and nodding to TI’s Live Your Life featuring Rihanna on radio.
After a while the raving driver who was now panting after much exaggeration, entered his bus cursing as he drove off. The soldier came to me again, I alighted out of courtesy, told him thank you, and he said, “you must be very angry madam,”
I laughed and answered, “Oga this is Lagos, we are all angry!”

15 comments:

Jinta said...

angry may be an understatement. raving lunatic maybe?

seriously, isi, fine girl, you mean to say you have blood in your body?

Isi said...

jinta!! if i catch you...

princesa said...

OMG! Isi!!
I used i was a jaguda but ol' girl, u take the crown,lol!!!

Seriuosly you chop too much liver o.

How's ur hand now?

femme said...

this is agbero matter o. you broke danfo glass? welldone!

Jarrai said...

omg!!! ha!!! i bet he wasn't expecting that. Hope your hand heals well

Next time..he will drive his van/bus berra.

rethots said...

"...got back into my car,....listened to Cool fm." and people think there must always be war. NO.

Silence, is one of the most powerful weapons of war; 'twill cost time "An hour or so later...". But then, we need to sacrifice something to make a change.

Did i still hear someone say we can't revolutionalise (change) Nigeria?

Afrobabe said...

A very angry madam indeed!!!!


She's backkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk...so u waited for me to dissapear abi...no lele (just learnt that)

Shubby Doo said...

@afro - lol...see you shouting she's back as if you yourself didn't just comeback from a 2 month blogging break

@isi - i hope your hand is ok...

aloted said...

wow its been a while i have been hear...

wow wat an experience!

NoLimit said...

lol lol!!!I guess we all have this area gal side to us...!!! you broke the bus window! gal I'm hailing you as I type...you too chop liver men!
Still deep in thought about:“Oga this is Lagos, we are all angry!”
true yarn!

bArOquE said...

ah, i cant believe that my Isi was fighting on the road...TI & Rihanna was just the moment

ok, first, go & do comprehensive insurance then i'll tell you the how & why you should break his glass (if he doesnt have some cash to give you) and still win the case, 2times over...

angry woman...LOL

OluwaDee said...

Babe u r something else.

Hope your car had some sort of insurance or guarantee?

shalewa said...

u smashed his glass?.i give u hand!hope ur hand is healed now.c,thats a good thing bout anger,it brings out the warrior in u.lol.and T.I's music was the energy boost u needed.1st time here and i enjoyed ur post.
Thumbs up on ur book.

Marjoram said...

LOL.!!!!

archiwiz said...

Oh my goodness! I thank God I'm not in Nigeria anymore cos I get angry at things like this. You're giving me serious ideas... Hope your hand has fully recovered sha ohh.